When I saw the title of this film, I had a brief absurd hope that it would be a documentary about Joe Chambers, the great jazz drummer whose 1960s collaborations with vibraphonist Bobby Hutcherson were landmarks of progressive composition that influenced Frank Zappa, among others.


But no. As the title implies, it's Joseph Chambers, not "Joe," and this Joseph Chambers isn't a Black musician with foresight, but rather another rural white guy with issues. Clayne Crawford plays him, and his cachet in the field of playing rural white guys with problems was certified with 2021's "The Killing of Two Lovers," in which he played a bearded rural white guy with problems who contemplates shooting his wife and her new honey, but thinks better of it, in order to make the audience feel something for him. Also, his beard.


After an eerie dolly shot into the woods, this film, also written and directed by Robert Machoian, introduces us to our title character, who is shaving OFF his beard. He leaves behind a sculpted swath of lip hair that he refers to as his "hunter's mustache" to his wife. In a jumble of expository dialogue between him and said wife, Tess (Jordana Brewster), we learn that Joseph is hell-bent on a solo hunting trip on this particular morning.


Tess is opposed to the journey. She wishes for him to remain in bed. She tells him he doesn't need to bag an animal because he makes a living selling insurance and is good at it, so they can afford groceries. She recalls that while she and Joseph moved to Tess' upbringing's rural area (Pell City, Alabama, as we later learn) to raise their children in a "safe" environment, she doesn't want them to become "end-of-the-world Fox News people." Which, according to Tess' family, they are. "If things get worse, we might need to know how to do this stuff," Joseph insists.


He hasn't done the math that would tell a wiser person that if things DO get worse, the woods will be teeming with idiots who believe they can kill their own food, and they'll all probably end up killing each other.


How well prepared is Joseph for his quest for a "ten pointer"? Not at all. He has to borrow a rifle and a pickup truck from one of his friends, waking him up before sunrise. Joseph climbs into a deer blind and imagines applause once he's arrived at the "property" on which he is to hunt—apparently, one of his other buddies owns a swatch of private hunting land. He takes an unintentional nap. This is a better strategy than he might think, given that one of the cardinal rules of deer hunting is to remain quiet and still, as deer are rather skittish creatures. Then he climbs down the deer blind and walks through the forest, leaving no breadcrumb trail behind him. He then discovers a truth that took my father several trips to the forest to discover: deer hunting is extremely boring. Soon after, he is standing in the woods, imagining himself as a pitcher in the 1991 World Series. I did not look it up. You are free to do so.


We're about a half-hour in, and Joseph is pacing on a ledge of earth, singing loudly, "I am the mustache man/king of the mountain, yes I am." And you're probably thinking, wow, it'd be nice if something HAPPENED in this movie, unless it's trying to be "Jeanne Dielman" for dorks with rifles. And, indeed, Joseph sees a deer. One who isn't bothered by his singing! As a result, he pursues. And ends up deeper in the woods, with no breadcrumbs to guide him. In a panic, he hears a noise, spins around, and fires. And we soon discover that he has killed a man rather than a deer with this single shot. What good fortune. What a goal! What nonsense!


Anyway. He miraculously returns to his pickup truck and weeps, moans, cries, and prays to God, and then he looks in the truck bed, and lo and behold, there's a pick AND a shovel. The problem of the dead guy could be solved. But what if the guy isn't really dead? And what if the not-dead guy is a genuine survivalist who can show Joseph the error of his ways? Well, then, we've got enough for another hour's worth of film, maybe! No, not entirely. But you get the idea, and perhaps the scarcity of ideas.


"The Integrity of Joseph Chambers" is a reasonably well-crafted non-journey hero's that may resonate with you if you're not already sick of movies about the White Masculinity Crisis in America. The topic is tiresome, tiring, aesthetically unappealing, and banal in this reviewer's opinion. Whatever the filmmaker believes he is doing, what he is really doing is attempting to find nobility through a character who is nothing more than an idiot making bad choice after bad choice until their, um, "integrity" compels them to make a difficult and morally correct choice. Congratulations, idiot.


Please make a Joe Chambers documentary soon. The man is still alive, despite being only 80 years old. It must be more than this puling patience-tester.